The Boomerang of Infidelity

The Boomerang of Infidelity

All couples should have a clear opinion about the meaning of infidelity, its implications when it is presented and how to avoid or face it.

In this article, we will take on the psychological, family and cultural implications of what one of the greatest threats that locks up against stability in couple relationships represents.

Socially, who is unfaithful, is seen as a winner, someone who acts as he wants and somehow exalts his sexuality, receiving in many cases the support of peers and friends, while the deceived person is subjected to teasing or seen with a false compassion to have "horns".

Who is deceived by his partner will generally be affected for long periods of his life by this type of treatment, turning the actions of his partner into a factor that unconsciously eats his confidence or leads him to compulsive jealousy.

As we all know and will analyze below, infidelity is currently promoted by the culture of consumerism and supported by ostensors of relativism in values. For feminist groups, it is a form of "revenge" against the actions of men, while it is increasingly present in novels, dramatized films.

However, it is not as simple as feeling that there is a cultural change and its implications will accompany both partners for long hours.


  • 1 The Psychological Implications of Infidelity
  • 2 The vision of psychology professionals
  • 3 Deception or cynicism
  • 4 Pseudo-cultural trends that promote Infidelity
  • 5 Facing Infidelity and fighting for relationships

The psychological implications of Infidelity

In order to understand the psychological implications, it is necessary to fully understand what the couple's relationship means and specifically love, which is not simply the empirical intuition of each one of us but a deep and productive reflection that can last a long time. The central axis is evidently in the way in which affectivity is interpreted, so that infidelity affects a set of situations and in general the life of people.

But let's summarize the psychological dimension of infidelity:

  1. SELF ESTEEM: Infidelity affects the vision that both members of the couple have of themselves, both who cheats and who is cheated. It generates in those who exercise it the illusion of being worth more ", of being" quoted "," irresistible "and" choosing whoever they want. "While, the affected person sees their self-esteem diminish, feeling that they have no capacity or attributes to retain together to himself the dear person.
  2. VALUES: Infidelity affects the scale of values, because it implies a dishonest management of relationships, lies, disloyalty and settling in a fictitious reality. It generates true wars between men and women.
  3. GENDER VISION: Infidelity affects confidence in the opposite gender (male or female), and therefore the type of relationship established in the future with the opposite sex.
  4. IDENTITY MODELS: Infidelity affects the identity models that children establish of their parents, or significant close relatives. In fact, it is reiterated that anyone who acts unfairly with their partner has a family history (usually in their parents) of similar actions.
  5. A CONFLICTIVE RE-KNOWLEDGE: This complex aspect of relationships has as its component the encounter with itself from the re-knowledge that the loved one makes of the person. It has an existential dimension. It is not the same to go ignored by the world than to have someone who expresses love for what one is, for the qualities, for the details and in their caresses gives solidity to the notion of living. Thus, some people feel "threatened their life", or lose their meaning, when they discover that they are unfaithful. What appears to be an immature reaction reflects a psychological condition typical of all human beings.

The vision of psychology professionals

Some psychologists, also driven by economic interests, or following cultural patterns of postmodernism, openly support infidelity as a factor that "refreshes relationships and introduces new elements in them by preserving them." Therefore, they even encourage men and women to commit it.

But whoever sustains it, this appreciation ignores the psychological dimension of human beings and the internal causes that lead one person to look for another to love each other. Based on the hedonistic enthusiasm, the excitement of the adventure and the supposed maturity of the couple who "accept without objection what happens" thus constitute the drivers of these practices in decadent and primary professionals.

Deception or cynicism

In all its dimensions, infidelity will present the deception / cynicism duality as an axis that will affect relationships. Do not forget that cynicism is a form of psychological abuse. To avoid being frowned upon, some couples passively accept each other's betrayal, in an endless chain of repressed problems.

Pseudo-cultural trends that promote Infidelity

There is currently a widespread trend in the media to promote infidelity with multiple expressions ranging from music, advertising, movies or soap operas.

But definitively, pornography is the greatest ingredient that promotes the lack of loyalty between couples, with the aggravating fact that the usual look of pornographic scenes or movies produces sexual addictions of unpredictable consequences.

Even more serious is the "swinger" phenomenon which promotes new models of infidelity where couples make pacts to accept promiscuity, allowing and / or witnessing relationships with other couples.

Supposedly there would be no infidelity here because both consent to such treatment, but in addition to the serious implications against the stability of the couple, their morals, their ethics and their psychology, they introduce into the relationships ingredients that sooner or later will generate irresolvable contradictions in the couple and distrust of falling in love, products of those fleeting encounters.

The swinger practice is decadent for its expressions, contrary to true love, which obeys laws and an economy whose violation degenerates into feelings alien to it, becoming a breeding ground for antivalores.

Face Infidelity and fight for relationships

In what to do? In the face of the phenomenon, there are facilist, revanchist or cynical outings in opposition to AFRONTAR, DIALOGUE, REFLECT BACKGROUND, SEEK HELP IF NECESSARY AND SAVE RELATIONSHIPS.

In this fight against individual, family and social decay, to save the couple's monogamous relationship, to preserve the family and to say, so it is very little accommodated to fashion, that infidelity is the expression of an anti-value that can affect any person and should be faced as an exercise of personal growth for the good of two people who at some point said they loved each other and for some reason lost their horizon.

By Jesús Ramón Gómez,